This is a period in my life when I have to wait. I have more to look forward to than more than I look behind at. I have a glorious expectation of life after graduation,I know that God has planted some good seeds in me that I will explore in the coming future. I wonder what life as a working class lady would be, especially when I know that there’s no going back to school at the end of the summer. What is going to change in my psyche? In my life? In my spending patterns? Even in my relationship with God?
For the most part, I am looking forward to (and praying about) joining a ministry where I can serve. I want to find a home church where I can serve in whatever ministry as needed, but preferably one of the “hidden” ministries like housekeeping lol
With all the great expectation in my heart, one big question I have time and again is the question of grace. Do I believe that God will hold me and never let me go? Do I believe Him enough to not worry about my tomorrow?
I always tell people in this season that I’ve been more fine that I thought I’d be. I thought I would be freaking out and crying myself to sleep every night because of some monumental changes that I didn’t fathom.
That hasn’t been my experience. Apart from two or three days last week when I had some weird emotions, I’ve been mostly fine. As I search my heart, I realize that the grace of God has changed something in my mind.
John 10:25-30 says:
Jesus answered, “I did tell you, but you do not believe. The works I do in my Father’s name testify about me, but you do not believe because you are not my sheep. My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.”
I read that passage a few days ago and it hit me. We are nestled both in the hands of Jesus and in the Father’s hands. Nothing can take you out of there. It’s a wonderful comfort to me. Jesus is holding on to me even more than I think I am holding on to Him.
I tend to be like Peter at the Mount of Transfiguration. When I’m having a good time in my spiritual life, I want to remain on the mountain. I want to build a tent and remain pitched there. But the true walk of faith in God comes in our everyday, mundane activities. We really see God move in the people we are in the valley and on the plains.
Some of us have idolized the so-called spiritual experience to be the glorious times when you get a trance or see a vision or have a dream. Those are wonderful times, but what we do in the still, quiet moments of waiting is more important.
This is a reminder to me as I count down the days, and pray and wait for a dream job, and hope for a wonderful life ahead. The most wonderful day of my life is today. Today is the day that the Lord has made and in it, I will rejoice and be glad. If Jesus has me in His hand today, He will have me in His hand in one month, one year, and ten years, and for the rest of my life. As as He said in John 10:29, He will give me eternal life!
For everyone waiting for something, I pray that God grants you the grace you need!
Featured image from Giphy.